Posted by: GeekHiker | January 10, 2011

I Really Shouldn’t Be Taking The Time To Write This

This working six days a week thing is for the birds.

So, now I’ve started my class.  And I’m working overtime and weekends.  And I’ve come to realize that there’s probably not a snowball’s chance that I’ll be able to get back to the other test until after this class (and its attendant test) is over and done with, which means I’ll have to re-study pretty much everything that I studied last fall.

In other words, I am well and truly up shit creek sans paddle.

Honestly?  I shouldn’t even be taking the time to write this.

I’m probably being entirely too hard on myself.  I’m sure I am.  Yet, I find myself more and more disappointed (in myself, natch) that I wasn’t able to pass that test back in November.  Then, at least, I’d be making progress.  Instead, I’m trying to make progress, and do redundant work at the same time.

Maybe it would be easier if it weren’t for work, but there’s a perfect storm going on at the moment where I have to be there on weekends to get certain pieces of equipment installed.  My co-worker will be there to help, but other than the two of us, there’s no other assistance.

Actually, that’s probably a good thing.  Seems whenever I DO get help, I end up doing more work fixing the stuff they screwed up.

Family, friends, all of you guys… everyone is wonderfully supportive.  Ultimately, though, for the majority of the time, I have to be my own booster.  Day-to-day, it’s just me, sitting in front of the computer, egging myself on, pushing myself to do the work, even when I can’t muster much enthusiasm to do so.  Believe me, being your own booster squad is frakking tiring.

And I have the nagging suspicion that I’ve said all this before.

*sigh*

Here and there, though, some minor relief.  To wit: I managed to get out hiking Saturday.  Nothing spectacular, just the trail out to Nicholas Flat, but with cloudy and overcast weather, the area was pretty much deserted (at least until the group of 30 showed up just as I was leaving).  For most of that morning, it was just me and the chirping birds.  There was little wind and, apart from the occasional passing plane, it made for a bit of quiet isolation.

And, with all the rains this year, the cattle pond was nearly full (compare the granite boulder to the panoramic picture in the link above):

Nicholas Flat 2011 01
Granite boulder at high water capacity

Nicholas Flat 2011 Pano 01
Panoramic view of the full cattle pond

It was a nice half day.

Unfortunately, tomorrow looks like it’s going to be tough.  Work all day, then I have to rush home to study.  Why the rush?  Because a couple of friends have invited me to have a beer tomorrow night.

I should study.  But I haven’t seen my friends since New Years, and I could really use the company.

And the beer.

Well, I did already admit to not knowing if I was making the right choices, didn’t I?

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Responses

  1. I think given your intense schedule between work and tests and classes…if you didn’t go have a beer with friends, I would be seriously concerned!

    You, my dear friend are stressed out. Being overwhelmed with so many stressors grabbing your time will eventually burn you out. It’s important to take time to have fun, relax, get your head out of work, tests, classes… It will help recharge you, so you can think more clearly, have better problem-solving abilities and focus on the task in front of you.

    If blogging helps you, I’m glad you’re posting! But if it’s just another task that drains you, I’d rather you spent the time drinking another beer with your mates.

    Big hugs from afar!

  2. I loved what Mirella wrote! Hugs from me too, offering lots of support while you’re knocking all this stuff out. Hang in there and definitely be good to yourself. It’s that whole oxygen mask thing: you can’t help anyone else if you can’t breathe, so put it on yourself first! 🙂

  3. Wow that is a big water level difference between now and your 2007 visit. Thanks for sharing and I’m glad you at least got a little break from work!

  4. There was a lot of mud and very little water when I was at Nicholas Flat. Quite a difference a little rain makes.

    You may just have to stretch out you plans a bit to make them less stressful.

    I’m glad you took time off for friends. All work and no play and such.

  5. is there any way you can leave the IT world and become a professional hiker? is there a market for hiking guides? or did i just make that up?

    yay for going out for beers with friends. that is a GREAT decision!

  6. Now when you say “for the birds” do you mean like those ones in Arkansas that fell out of the sky and DIED? Because that’s what working on the weekends would do to me…

    Have you ever thought of trying to become a park ranger? Seems like that might be more fun than cleaning up other people’s computer messes.

    Have an extra beer for me, would ya? 🙂

  7. “Believe me, being your own booster squad is frakking tiring.”
    Not only do I believe you, I UNDERSTAND you. Just today I was verbalizing how much it can drain to keep pushing for better things and happy moments alone. It sucks.
    It WILL get better. Later. All the work and the classes and the stuff. That’ll pass.
    I have a feeling you need to read that.

  8. So maybe you can get your studying stuff all on a disc or a podcast and then listen to it on the 6 hour drive to Davis?? Kill two birds. Study and visit? No? I tried.

  9. I think all students find this stuff hard, and exhausting. And in my experience? the closer you get to being finished, the harder and more exhausting it all is!

  10. Taking breaks will keep you sane. Don’t stop.

  11. Sub-optimal situation, huh? Deal with that onslaught of work and then cut down on your workload as soon as you can afterwards (dedicate 20 to 30% of your then “free time” to those tests). I seriously find hard to believe there are only 2 guys able to complete the assignment you mentioned however.

    You’ve got to prioritize your objectives : your current job is the more important, hence your focus on it. Those exams actually come second. Unless you really want to screw everything at once and/or risk a burn-out, settle down and resolve every problem after the other.

  12. Forward, darlin’. November 2010 is over, so let that bastahd go.

    And I hope you enjoyed the friends and the beer. Or the beer and the friends. . . .

  13. MissMcCracken – Fun? Relax? What are those?

    Spleeness – Hmmm… I dunno, isn’t self-torture part of the IT Geek credo or something? 😉

    TGAW – Amazing, isn’t it? Though, in fairness, we did have some pretty impressive rains in December…

    Homer-Dog – I’ve seen it both ways: lake and mud-flat. They both have their photographic charms. As for play, there can be such a thing as too much…

    BlakSpring – Not really (it’s quite the crowded market, and doesn’t exactly come with medical). Ah, yes, the wonders of beer…

    MelHeth – Uhhh… I think I just used it as an old adage! As for a park ranger, try to find the article in Backpacker from a few months back about the special hell of being a NPS Ranger…

    Narami – True! Maybe I should hire a cheering squad. And thanks for saying that it’ll get better. That’s always good to hear.

    Charmacc – Unfortunately, all the stuff is online. Sorry, Davis ‘taint gonna happen this time around. 😦

    LeafProbably – And I’m not even sure where the finish is!

    David – Ah, but what if there’s not even time for breaks any more?

    Gany – Yeah, as soon as this project at work is done, life will be a little easier… As for putting the exams second, at the moment I’m in a class with homework assignments, so I kinda have to burn the candle at both ends this time around…

    AbsurdBeats – Can’t; I need to take that test again or it means I spent 2 ½ months studying for it the first time for absolutely nothing…

  14. I love how you said “frakking”. I say that all the time now too.


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