The GeekHiker

(This one’s a bit snarky. You have been warned.)

This is it, I’ve officially crossed into the next age bracket.

Tonight, according to the barrage of advertising, is the premiere of Quarterlife. No way in hell will I give it the dignity of a link.

Seriously, the concept of this one is this: the story of a bunch of twentysomethings who haven’t figured out their lives yet. Wah. Hell, I’m in my mid-thirties and I still don’t have a clue.

Geez, I wish I’d known I was supposed to have figured it all out ten years ago. I would have been sure to suffer more. But nooooo, I didn’t have a life crisis at 25. Depressed as hell, sure, but crisis, no.

What’s next? Eighthlife, the series about 10-year-olds who haven’t picked a career yet?

Heaven help the characters in the series (all “artistic-types”, natch) when they reach their thirties and actually realize they need to save for retirement.

I can’t imagine why anyone who isn’t in their twenties would have any interest at all in watching this one. If you’re under twenty, well, those people are old. And if you’re past twenty-nine, why on earth would you waste an hour watching twenty-somethings complain? For an hour?

Me, I think I’ll read a book instead.

Still, gotta give credit to NBC: they’ve created a show that is truly aimed at its target-audience. “See, we know you’re suffering, artistic twenty-somethings, and we feel your pain.” As much, I suppose, as a network-executive can.

Curiosity as to just how marketing-created this show could be led me to the website, which defines the show as “chart[ing] the sometimes excruciating, sometimes comic, often emotional experiences that comprise coming of age in the 21st century.”

Ah, yes, because none of that stuff happened to those who went through their twenties in the ancient 20^th century. And, yep, life is pretty boring after your twenties. None of those “emotional experiences” kind of stuff anymore. Really. Trust me.

My favorite part? The character described as a “geek-extraordinaire”. And how do we know which one is the geek? Because, out of the six uber-beautiful cast members, he’s the one wearing glasses.

I laughed out loud at that one, because of course, the only real prerequisite for being a geek is glasses. At least on TV.

Of course if NBC really wants to target a demographic they should go for the biggest fish around: the baby boomers. (Cuz, you know, we haven’t really heard enough about them over the years, right?)

Soon enough, they’ll be all retired, and the premiere of Seventysomething shouldn’t be far behind. Episodes will feature groups of boomers, sitting around in a Starbucks, complaining about their rheumatoid arthritis and how the kids don’t visit any more.

Hm. Actually, that might work. Hey NBC, have your people give my people a call, ‘k?

Kidding aside, I really don’t have a problem with this series existing. I mean, if it finds an audience, what do I care?

What I do have a problem with is the fact that, when I was a whiny twenty-something, I didn’t have the wherewithal to turn around and sell it to a major television network and make a small pile of cash in the process.

Damn.