Posted by: GeekHiker | July 16, 2008

Looking Away

At the gym tonight I did a relatively light workout, mostly lower body. It hurts like hell, but there are less exercises that I do for the legs than for the upper body, so I rather like Wednesdays as I get out a bit earlier to head home for a shower and dinner.

Finishing up my set, I headed back towards the locker room past the cardio section.

Working out on one of the bikes was a girl I’d seen in the gym before. She’s cute brunette with angular features and a great set of legs. (Total confession: I’m a leg man who’s never actually dated someone with a great set of legs. Go me.)

Walking past, she looked up and I caught her eye. I smiled a little bit.

She immediately looked back down at her magazine.

I know that I’m not an unattractive person; I mean, I’m not gonna make a magazine cover anytime soon or ‘nothin, but, as I’ve mentioned before, I’ve been told I’m cute. Still, when a girl sees me and I don’t even warrant a return smile, sometimes believing that about myself feels like an uphill battle.

And yes, before anyone asks, I did try my best to think “well, she’s just a stuck up bitch.”

Didn’t help much, though.

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Responses

  1. Maybe she’s shy? I’ve had a few guys smile at me at the gym, and I got a bit self-conscious about it.

    I mean, I’m walking around in shorts and a sports bra, for goodness sakes!

  2. I do the same thing at the gym, regardless of what the guy looks like. Because, yes also quite self-conscious in my workout gear but also because, and this is going to sound cliche, but I’m there to work out and I don’t want to be hit on. So maybe if I don’t smile back, I’ll get left alone? And hey, it seems to be working because I’m still single! Maybe if you tried one of those quick smiles followed by a quick look away before she can react she would know you’re not there to pick up either?

  3. There could be lots of reasons why she didn’t return your smile, but I know it’s hard not to take it personally and feel rejected to some degree. And I think I make it worse for myself because I tend to over-think these things and read too much into it. But in the immortal words of Popeye – “I yam what I yam!”

  4. I agree with the above, I tend to get flustered when I catch someone looking at me and often find myself looking away (with my inner monologue saying something like “couldn’t you have at least SMILED? DOH!!!”). I know it’s not a good feeling, but it definitely doesn’t mean you didn’t deserve a smile OR that she didnt give you one bc she thought badly of you.

  5. One more reason not to go to the gym…

  6. I worked at a coffeehouse in college and had crushes on a few of my regular customers. Sometimes when they would come in, I’d get so flustered, I would hide from them in the back. I’d literally see them at the counter and walk away – even though I thought they were totally cute. Girls are stupid sometimes.

    Or maybe she was just a stuck up beeyatch.

  7. Chin up hun. There could have been any number of reasons. She could have been completely distracted by goodness knows what else, or tired, or thinking “gee, I’m all sweaty and at the gym, let’s avoid as much human contact as possible”…my list could go on.

    I also second Mel’s comment: “Girls are stupid sometimes.” We are. It happens.

  8. I’m gonna have to agree with the peanut gallery and say it has nothing to do with you. If bike-girl is anything like me, working out is a chore, not a luxury. I go because I have to. Endorphins my ass.

    Reading a magazine helps me forget that, although I can manage to step my way through 40 minutes on a stairmaster, I will get winded on the flight of stairs leading out the gym. David Beckham could be stepping in tandum with me and I would still wear a scowl.

    Unless she’s in full make-up with a carefully color coordinated outfit (hairtie-matches-socks kind of thing), chances are she’s just there to work and not smile at charming geeky hikers.

  9. See, here’s the thing. A woman wants to be pursued. Not hunted.

    But for that you need the right gear. So get yourself a puppy, a baby, and a wedding ring. It’s like catching trout in a bucket I tell you…

  10. Don’t fret.

    As a lot of my friends have confessed, she’s prolly going to the gym to work out and the last thing she wants is to shake off a guy. I’m not saying you’re gonna hit on her, but maybe if she’d smiled back, she might have thought that you would have thought that was an invitation to chat?

  11. to me, the gym is a weird place to get picked up. not knowing anything about a guy who’s smiling at me at the gym, i’d think he was a total creep. totally falling into the whole “gonna go to the gym to work out for show and pick me up a girl” mentality …

    so yeah, basically echoing everybody here and say that i don’t think you should take it personally!!!

  12. I always look away and then normally end up kicking myself. :-/ It’s definitely a shy thing, so don’t take it personally. 🙂


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