Posted by: GeekHiker | August 16, 2008


(Hope this post doesn’t seem too, uh, weird on the heels of yesterday’s Doctor Sillyness…)

Okay, so this isn’t the post that I thought I was going to write.

I thought I was going to be writing a post about over-thinking something. About reading too much into things. About the fact that my brain sometimes runs down wild tangents that, ultimately, are my achillies heel.

The strange thing is that my brain doesn’t seem to be doing that much at the moment, which is strange and confusing to me. I mean, you think you know yourself, and then…

Okay, maybe this needs a little context, no?

See, thing is, I have a coffee and/or lunch date tomorrow with the twenty-nine year old. I think we’ll be figuring out which at the time we meet.

Now what I expected was that I would, in my traditional style, be completely over-thinking the whole damn thing. Reading too much into things in her e-mail. Reading too much into her actions. It’s just what I do, right?

For example, a few days after we started e-mailing, she hid her profile on the site (being a contact, I could still see it, of course). Most times, I know EXACTLY where my thought pattern would have gone: somewhere down the path of “oh, geez, she must already have a ton of dates and I can’t compete against any of them because they’re all probably better looking” or “oh, crap, she’s a psycho hose-beast whose fallen for me and has started planning our life together all the way through retirement and death after only three e-mails” or some such sillyness.

Thing is: I don’t really care. Maybe, since she was a new profile on the site, she was getting flooded with e-mails from prospective suitors. I don’t know. And I’m not really thinking about it.

I think this is a good thing. I think.

Why the uncertainty? Because while, on the one hand, it’s managed to radically reduce my stress level about tomorrow, and while I am looking forward to it, I can’t say that I’m excited about it. I mean, I’m excited about it, but I’m not jumping up and down on a couch on Oprah EXCITED about it.

Crap. Is this making any sense at all?

So, yeah, confusion. Signs that I’m burnt out? Signs that I’ve become jaded? Would that really be surprising after my last date? All whopping forty minutes of it?

Then again, I’m not really thinking much about all those things either.

In fact, there’s only really two things I’m having trouble figuring out at the moment:

1. If it’s just a casual coffee and/or lunch, should I still bring a flower (i.e. a rose)?


2. If we’re meeting for said casual coffee and/or lunch east of downtown, where the high is supposed to be 88, is it okay to show up in shorts?

I guess I’ll just have to figure those out by tomorrow.

Oh, and if I seem totally calm, cool, and collected, don’t believe it. It’s my first date in nine months. I’m nervous as hell.

Which is why, even though this post isn’t quite the post I thought I was going to write about this date, I didn’t change the title. 😉



  1. As long as there is no crapping and no couch jumping it should be fine.

    To me shorts are fine but the rose might weird me out.

    I bet others are the opposite though so, really, I am no help.

  2. I agree. Ditch the rose.

  3. If it’s going to be 88 degrees and the guy I was going out with didn’t wear shorts, I’d be surprised. Of course, clothing options are easier for me as a woman – I’d most likely wear a casual skirt or sundress.

    So yes, shorts are o.k.

    I certainly like it when a guy brings me a flower/flowers, but since it’s going to be a casual date, perhaps save that for Date #2? Although, if you still wanted to do something sweet (and I definitely think a flower is sweet), maybe go for something other than a rose – maybe a sunflower or a pretty gerbera daisy?

    I’ve discovered, over the past few years, that it’s better to not have any expectations going into a date. That way, if it doesn’t go well, you’re not crushed – as I tend to often be, because I read into everything, like you mentioned.

    Have a great time, and, of course, share the details with us afterwards 🙂

  4. I agree with ECT, ditch the rose, but bring a different flower. The ones she suggest are pretty cool and different for a first meeting.

    Good luck GH, I hope you both a have a really nice time.

  5. A rose is a little much for a first date I would think. Just chill, be yourself, and quit thinking so much. (I know, easier said then done.)

  6. No to the rose. No, no, no. No flowers on the first date. Mr. Dingo suggested spending the money on condoms but I told him to shut up — GH is not that type of guy. He’ll wait until the second date to jump her bones.

    As for the shorts, as long as they are not denim shorts with the threads hanging from the end and a red bandanna hanging out the back pocket, I think you are okay.

  7. Shorts yes. Rose no. Daisy or wildflowers, sure. Have fun! You’re probably feeling about it just how you should be. Its when you finally just “let things happens as they happen” that things actually start to happen.

  8. I concur that shorts are totally appropriate but save the rose for date # 2. You have to suss out whether she is worth your gentlemanliness first. 🙂

  9. xoD!!! Hee. Tee hee.

    I think it’s ok that you are… you know, ok. Sometimes it’s good not to overthink, I think it’s flowing good, what you are feeling.
    I hope it turns out good too!! 🙂

    & for another date, maybe not roses? picking another flower makes it so much special and refreshing.

  10. Crap, I always forget that you live in a scorching hot area. I would have tried to avoid shorts but hey, if you don’t want to melt…

    Roses ? No.

  11. I’m way too late on this, but it looks like you go great advice so I am sure you did fabulously.

  12. I too am way late. I hope it went well and I can’t wait to hear about it!

  13. Dude, it’s coffee. Just chill out.

    Or, it’s kinda late now. I’ll have to see what awaits next in my RSS reader!

  14. Oooh I can’t wait for the follow-up post to this!! In fact, I’m going to cheat and email you now. 😀

  15. To all: I brought no flower, but did wear jeans. So that solved that.

    Just A Girl – Nope, I decided against the couch jumping. 😉

    Hilary – Done!

    East Coast Teacher – Yeah, I thought about going with the kilt… not! I try to keep the expectations out, but is that really possible?

    Dobegil – I agree, those are good suggestions, though I’ll wait for the second date…

    Homer-Dog – It is easier said than done, but I seemed to do okay this time around.

    Dingo – So I guess you’re saying no rose? 😉 Heh, Mr. Dingo is more bold than I! Shoot, I wish I’d known about the red bandana… 😉

    Backpackermomma – Thanks. I tried my best to do just that!

    SingleFabulous – Even on a first date, I try to be a gentleman…

    Narami – Thanks for the positive thoughts and flower suggestions.

    Gany – I went with the long pants. It was… hot.

    TheCoconutDiaries – Thanks. Time will tell, I suppose.

    Rachel – The thought is appreciated anyway!

    AA – Right. I’m sooo chill. Heh.

    Mel Heth – And so you did!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: